"more than even one more day"

I want May to be a good month. Of course I want every month to be good in a general hopeful kind of way, but particularly May particularly now. January was a month of upheaval. February was a month of too many things to do and barely enough time. March was a month of paralysis, and then, death. April was a month of grief and needing my hand held tightly. May is going to be a month of reflection and big decisions.

There are things I have time for and things that I don't, or refuse to make time for.

I have time for: making up my mind about aprés-Vista plans, sweetness, laughter, conversations where we really listen and not just wait impatiently to say our turn, delicious shared meals, exercising, finding everyday adventures, kisses, holding your hand, keeping my room clean, pursuing my ethnography again, writing, slowing down my internal metronome once in awhile, sleeping better, peaceful silence

I don't have time for: anything that looks at "the things I have time for" in the face and gives it the finger